Real Men/Women of Genius #43

[Two fine friends to thank this morning! Thanks to Don Charles Lundell, of ZombieRunner fame, for this idea; and thanks to Lynnor (“Erma Bombeck”) Matheney, of the great dust & cactus State of Texas, for this picture]:
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=11157564&l=ec9b6e5a67&id=824005424

Bud Light presents…

REAL MEN OF GENIUS

{Real men of geeeeeene-yuss}

Today we salute you, Mr. Name-Dropper of Every Running Race on the Planet You Ever Ran.

{Mis-ter “Whaaat-race-did-you-say that-I-of-courrrrrse-have-run?”}

Yes sir, you are the encyclopedic accumulation of all names, all titles, all websites, all knowledge, all distances, all terrain, and whatever everything else is that pertains to whatever race whatever person within earshot has just mentioned. No matter what it is, no matter how long or measured or far away, or even how impossible it is to get to and participate in once you do, you have already been there, done that.

{“I diiiiiid ‘The Goofy’ the fiiiiiiiirst yeeeear it was in-ven-ted!”}

Awesome. Just awesome. Someone mentions their next vacation is to Bangkok, Thailand, and you have been there and done *that* marathon-of-sorts, too. Even if it was only the “Kiddie Quarter Mile” for children under 12 during the Expo, you did it as a child–in 1955–before public footraces were heard of.

{“I wonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn it whennnnnnn it was still called Siam!”}

Uzbekistan 10K? Sure. Two years ago. Mozambique 50000 Kilometers? Yup. Last summer. Ride & Slide Across the Swiss Alps? Jawohl! The Saudi Sixty? Right. The Singapore Sing-For-More Marathon and also the 100K Relay? Of course. You ran it when you were 30 and did both races simultaneously by yourself.

{“Youuuuu should’ve seeeeeen ME be an eight-mem-berrr team!”}

Every single possible marathon, ultramarathon, triathlon, Ironman, double-Ironman, dodecahedron-triathlon, and round-the-world footrace (twice! on hands and knees!!) that started when you were a little boy? And is still underway? You’ve done it. Yep. Finished it NEXT week. You are the only human being in the galaxy that has, already, participated in and triumphed over every possible athletic event in and around and within twenty-five light-years of our humble globe.

{“IIIIIIIIIIIII donnnnnnn’t like to brag or annnnnnnn-y-thing.”}

So crack open an ice-cold Bud Light, Oh Captain Cocky of the Starship Braggadocio, because the only possible way you could *ever* be one-upped in the name-dropping department would be by YET ONE MORE young woman who’s been there and done: Tiger Woods.

{Mis-ter Name-Drop-per of Ev-er-y Run-ning Race on the Pla-net You Ever Ran!}

Bud Light beer: we don’t care where it’s made; we just dig their commercials.

( O_O )

Yours troubly,

Rich Limacher
TheTroubadour@sbcglobal.net

Yankee Folly of the Day:
So what we want to know is, where are all the ten-thousand women who supposedly “did” Wilt Chamberlain?