Category: Published Musical Nonsense

[Friends, I am NOT supposed to be here–figuratively and, perhaps, literally. I’m supposed to be doing “The Beer Run.” However, this past Wednesday–naught but three long exasperating days ago–in fact just after having posted my tribute to Scott Jurek–directly above this house roared an F1 tornado. Talk about “learning how to dance in the rain”!!!...

[Hey, allah yous friends, fiends, friendettes, and fiendees, I have news! It turns out that “Will The Real Inspirer for RM/WoG #50 Please Come Forward?” has in fact come forward. He is none other than Bill Thom, the true cybertronic wizard behind RunRace.net, who happened to be running the Ice Age 50M way back in...

Bud Light presents… REAL MEN OF GENIUS {Re-al men of geeeeeene-yuss} Today we salute you, Mr. Cheerfully Optimistic and Overly Encouraging Aid Station Guy. {Mis-ter, weee knowwwwww what the cut-offfffffffs are!} Yes, we’re wearing our watch. No, we’re not sitting here because we’re only just dimly aware of what ours and yours and the race’s...

[Does it come as any surprise now–after what seems (to me) to be like A MONTH!–that my computer is now repaired and back on top of my desk? (It’s why they call it a “desktop” methinks.) Anyway, today also marks about one full year in the business of contributing to Bad Joke Fridays with… yo,...

[I would just like to extend a non-RM/WoG shout-out to my new buddy, A.J. Johnson, who had the misfortune of enduring my pacing services last weekend at MMT100. Despite my best efforts, it was a successful dodging of said services- because he finished. Congratulations, my friend! And for your reward, you now hold an “exemption”...

[It is very fitting that this edition–marking almost one whole year of series existence–be composed here in Maryland, at the home of my friend and compatriot, Mike Bur. For here is where it all started. Approximately two years ago, he and I sat at his dining room table and conjured up how to adapt those...

Ingelhook Wineries present… REAL WOMEN OF GENIUS {Real gals of geeeeeene-yuss} Today we raise our glass to you, Miss Interpretiv-Runnour, Taker of All Things Waaay Too Personal. {Miss “Quit try-ying to criiii-tiiiii-cize meeee all the time!”} So we congratulate you on a recent second-place finish. “You’re just being sarcastic,” you say. “I should’ve had first....

[Well, thanks to nobody who wasn’t curious enough to possibly give-a-sh*t less, yours troubly did, in fact, complete Uncle Sam’s Trillion Dollar Ultramarathon a few hours before cutoff. Too bad yours troubledly couldn’t do that in regular ultras as well. So today’s “offering” to the comedy-challenged gods & goddesses was inadvertently suggested awhile ago by...

Bud Light presents… REAL MEN OF GENIUS {Real men of geeeeeene-yuss} Today we salute you, Mr. Overly Confident Too-Eager Virgin Barkley Enterer. {Mis-ter “IIIIIIIII’M gon-na beeeeee THE NEXT FIN-ISH-ER!”} Of course you can’t possibly wrap your head around how it could possibly be so difficult—for, perhaps, all those other previous eight hundred overly eager virgins,...

Bud Light presents… REAL MEN OF GENIUS {Real men of geeeeeene-yuss} Today we salute you, Mr. Emailing-on-the-Sly While You’re at Work Guy. {Mis-ter “Don’t Call Me In-to the Meet-ing Right Now; I’m On-Line!”} Never mind the fact that the struggling firm of Dewey, Cheatum, & Howe pays you several hundred dollars per hour to analyze...